santa has chicken legs.

so I decided to try on my santa suit tonight. y'know, see if miyuki has a santa fetish, etc. no dice on that front. but I did learn one thing. the people who make cheap ass santa suits that party city sells seem to think santa has chicken legs.

maybe you don't know this about me, but I have GREAT legs. the beer gut, the lack of upper body definition, the big nose... not my good features. but my legs? I have great legs. thighs like tree trunks, huge calves with lots of definition. I attribute my legs partly to genetics, partly years of swimming. anyway, my calves are bigger than most guys' biceps. I actually measured them. 22 inch thighs, 19 inch calves. woo. and they don't fit in the damn santa boot covers.

I've had to remove nearly six inches of stitches to just to pull them on. if it weren't for the fact that I'll be running around in a crappy felt santa suit, and I'll be shitfaced, I might be concerned about the tackiness of having a large hole in the back of my boots where you can see skin...

I'm really looking forward to santacon. my listerine rumpleminze is awesome. it burns like hell, but it's so tasty.

not much else to report. but everyone feel free to wish miyuki happy birthday. she's old on friday. she keeps trying to tell me her birthday is thursday, but I think she just wants her prezzies early.